Wednesday, February 24

A look into my self-esteem or lack there of

So for my Drugs and Behavior class we have to participate in this Journal Program that is particularly focused on our beliefs and attitudes about alcohol and other drugs/ substances. Since I am really conservative on these issues and cause I am so naive having no experience with any of this a part from a sip here and there and one drink I had the journal is rather boring for a lot of the time and I don't think it is going to help the research much but every once in a while there will be a particularly relevant topic. link or article that they share that will really resonate and actually informing me a great deal. Also they have had several quizzes. And you know my I am a sucker for personal quizzes that will tell me who I am so I thought I would share one with you. There is actually a website full of fun psychology quizzes they shared at and I will most likely end up passing all my results on here for you to see in time. But for now I thought I would share my results of self-esteem.

For me self-esteem has always been one of my down faults I am very hard on myself and am string for perfection and demand perfection and we all now I am far from perfection so this doesn't work. Eventually I realize how low my self esteem was and it made me feel like all the much more of a failure as I couldn't even like myself. I was convinced I was the worst person in the world and yeah not a good time. And still my self esteem is really low... and not all that much better due to circumstances right now but I found my results to actually be a lot higher than I would have expect. Yes I still have low self-esteem but I got a 48%. I find that very positive, could have been a lot lower. My positivity made me think all the more convincingly that maybe I am not helpless and so did the description I received as follows...

Your results indicate that your opinion of yourself is generally positive, but your sense of self-worth isn\'t as strong as it could be. You sometimes put yourself down, falling victim to your own self-depreciating statements. An unstable sense of self-worth can result from a wide range of factors: perhaps you\'ve recently gone through a particularly difficult period in your life, or you didn\'t get the support you needed from others when you were growing up. The important thing however, is not to figure out who/what is to blame; it is to recognize that it\'s now up to you to boost your self-image. There are certain attitudes and beliefs that have been found to contribute to and \"feed\" a negative self-image, and you appear to have some of them. Examples would be believing that you don\'t deserve to be loved or respected, believing that you\'re not good enough for someone, and focusing only on your perceived faults rather than good qualities. While you may not necessarily f! eel all of these things all of the time, there may be a few that are ingrained in your mindset to the point that they are surely affecting your life. You may not even realize it, but these beliefs can discourage you from pursuing your goals, cause you unnecessary stress, and even become self-fulfilling prophecies. A slight change in mindset could really make a difference in your life.

I found these results very positive and I think I am really glad they wrote it like this particularly for all of us with low-self-esteem. But seriously it recognized the obvious that I am too hard on myself and that I think destructive thoughts and that I am often convinced that no one likes me and that I am the biggest loser on the face of the planet. But what this does as well as says how this is not always the case for one and for tow it does not have to be this way there is hope. I can learn to find worth in myself and that there is something there I just mask it out with lies. I feel that recognizing some of the thoughts I feel and learning to dismiss them and learning to see the good and the accomplishments in me that I can learn to work on this and stop myself from falling for Satan's trap.

There was another article that this Journal shared with us that mentioned how many people with low self-esteem may often "fake it until them make it" Where they will act as if they have high self-esteem to mask there low self-esteem. The interesting part of this is that people who do this are far more likely to actually develop higher self-esteem simply by faking it. So I think it is time I stopped living in hopelessness thinking I am nothing. I am somebody and I am special I am God's daughter and if he loved me enough to die for me then I am certainly worth living for! I am Krista and I am something else, now I am going to live it and stop crushing and putting down myself, for I was created to do something wonderful and amazing so now I am not going to stand in the way of doing this great thing any longer. Watch out world here comes Krista in full swing!!!

I also wanted to share with you some tips for improving self esteem from . Hopefully this can help me and anyone else out there that is or has tended to struggle with low-self-esteem.

1. Become aware of and change your negative self-talk. Learn to recognize the self-limiting, self-deprecating things you say to yourself and how to dispute those beliefs and replace them with positive, reassuring statements about yourself. Don’t indulge yourself in self-criticism.

2. Stop comparing yourself to others. There will always be people who are smarter, taller, shorter, thinner, heavier, cuter, more handsome, richer, have better jobs, make better grades, . . . have more of whatever than you do. If you play the comparison game, you’re sure to discourage yourself because you will consistently run into people to whom you’ll feel inadequate. So stop comparing yourself to others – it only hurts you.

3. Make decisions that are in alignment with your values. Behaving in ways that are counter to your own values leads to feelings of guilt, shame and discouragement. Know what is of value to you and honor those principles, regardless of what the crowd does.

4. Focus on your strengths. Make a list of at least 10 of your positive qualities and review your list often. Are you honest? Kind? Generous? Helpful? Creative? Resilient? Focusing on “what is” rather than “what’s not” will change your mood and give you’re the energy and encouragement to persevere.

5. Start your day on a positive note. Ask yourself how you want your day to go before you get out of bed. Imagine it unfolding that way and fill yourself with anticipation that you will be able to create your day the way you want. The attitude you carry into any activity greatly impacts the outcome, so create positive experiences in your life by anticipating that they will be positive.

6. Practice gratitude. Ask yourself “What am I happy about in my life?” “What am I proud of?” What am I grateful for?” “What good is happening in my life right now?” The answers to these questions can be the simple things in life: a beautiful day, enough food to eat, the love of someone close to you, the freedom to go to school to better your life, the loyalty of a pet, the comfort of your bed. There are millions of small things to be grateful for and remembering to recognize these will change the way you see yourself and your life.

7. Make a list of your past accomplishments. These don't have to be monumental successes. They can be anything of which you’re proud, such as graduating from high school, attending college, receiving a promotion, doing well on a test, attending to the day-to-day necessities of life, etc. Read your list often and allow yourself to experience a sense of accomplishments with each item, feeling the joy and satisfaction that came with the initial experience.

8. Take good care of yourself. On a physical level, this means eating healthily, exercising, getting plenty of sleep, learning to relax or perhaps, getting an occasional massage. It also means not overindulging in any one area that would cause negative consequences. On an emotional level, it might mean avoiding negative people and giving yourself the encouragement and support you need.

9. Cultivate a social life. Isolation can lead to loneliness, apathy, and depression so make an effort to include other people in your life. Invite friends out or to your home– don’t wait for them to call you. Become a volunteer with an organization you value – giving to others always takes our minds off ourselves.

10. Don’t take life so seriously. Have fun while maintaining a healthy balance between meeting responsibilities and doing the things you love. Life is too short to focus only on the serious aspects.

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